The right one is killing me! And I really mean it. You know I am in week two from my last chemo and I should really be on the home stretch people. No issues, starting to feel better and then my nose, or nostril, starts hurting. I think it started Monday, but maybe it was Sunday, who knows. But Tuesday, just sitting here at work, it starts aching so bad, I can't take it no more and I am calling the doctor.
Now when I call, I am a little embarrassed, right? Who wouldn't be? It goes something like this...
"Thank you for calling blah, blah blah, how can I help you?"
I say, "Can I talk with Dr. Lee's nurse?"
"What is this regarding?"
Long Pause...um, how do I answer..."well, uh, my nose is killing me." Yep, that is what I said...
Another long pause, and then I continue with an explanation of how my nose has kind of hurt through the whole process of chemo due to my nose hairs falling out and the sensitivity that happens and.... she cuts me off.
"You need to talk to Dr. Lee right away. I will send you to her voicemail in Albany and she will call you back."
"OK," I said. Then I hear a ring and another woman answers and I am dreading having to say my nose hurts again, but she asks, but first, of course, I want to know why I didn't go to her voicemail. So the woman takes my message and about two minutes later the doctor is calling.
Yep it hurts, yep its red, yep its like one big sore all over my right nostril.... And now I am taking yet, another pill - Hallelujah! I have an infection in my nose, and it traveled up my nose and down into my gums and mouth, the whole right side of my face was swollen up like the elephant man yesterday. I didn't sleep at all, even after taking three percocets to stop the pounding pain. I was not a pretty site. I stayed home from work again - I hate it. But I would have been of no use, what, no sleep and throbbing pain.
Stayed in bed til noon, well after I got up a couple times to let the dogs out, watched the taped Bachelor from the night before, went back to bed, got up at 3:30 and thought I should walk the dogs, because my nose felt better. hahahaha NO WAY did it feel better. As long as I don't move and stay in bed it feels better. But I made myself walk the dogs, only around the big block and wouldn't you know it, the rain came pounding down on me and the dogs. My nose is killing me!!!! And back to bed.
Well, today I am so much better, knew I would be and just had to sleep it off AND... take more pills. Came to work, doing good except my eye lids are so swollen, not sure why, but I am functioning today. But in the moment I just wanted to shoot myself. I am tired of feeling pain, tired of knowing pain, tired of dealing with pain. All that comes to mind is - If it doesn't kill you, it only makes you stronger....so true, so true, I am still alive!
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