Wednesday, October 6th , 2010
“Somebody shoot me, PLEASE, now, make this stop! There is always that stupid commercial and the EASY button - need it NOW!!!!”
Tried eating broth, water, anything liquid, couldn’t keep it down. Wouldn’t eat jello because of how it makes my teeth feel. The sugar is obnoxious. And I wasn’t going to brush my teeth, couldn’t imagine how that would be possible.
6am - That was it, the pain was way too much to bear anymore, couldn’t move, couldn’t function, constant loss of control because of the meds, no pain relief really. And the ice was freezing!
8am – That’s it, this sucks! Gotta make myself move. Call the nurse, I want up, NOW. Still can’t keep anything down, we tried more broth. Seriously, I would eat it, feel fine, just lay there, and then, “oh my god, I am gonna puke!” grab my bag, puke, hold it, call the nurse, she measured, dumped it, flushed it. Move on, I am starving people! Oh yes, and they gave me the nausea medicine, the best stuff, didn’t work. Maybe they should go back to the drawing board with that. Just saying…..
OK, so nurse comes in, looks at me like I am crazy when I say I have to get up, and I start sitting. I want to scream because it hurts so bad, but I am not gonna tell her. I am going to get out of this bed. She will not feel my pain, and will not tell me no! We get the catheter off the bed and on the IV pole (yes, I am peeing in a bag, hated it, but necessary), IV's wrapped, pain pump attached with the local anesthetic, and the drain balls attached... Ready, set, go (as Addison would say).
I sit up. Dizzy, here it comes, puke bag please… vomit, here you go, now help me up.
I stand up. Dizzy, but no vomit is knocking, we are good. One step, this isn’t so bad, right? Oh stumble, catch me. She did. Yeah for her. She wants to put me back in bed. No! I won! we walk. I walked to the door, back to the bed, to the door, back to the bed and get back in bed. Small victory, but I won! It is all about competition, give me that chance of victory and I will push for it. Now where is that pain pump? Good, got it, push it, lay down. Ice please. And the broth, let's do chicken, again.
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